Doodling & Patiently Waiting To Do Laundry

Today is laundry day; before I moved out of my parents house; I remember days when I would stand in front of my mothers washer and dryer and do loads of laundry. I had a good life back then with my parents & lately I’m emotionally missing them; thinking of all the ways I had been disrespectful to them & myself in my 20’s up till recently. It’s been 2 months (Since I got back from H.E.B. Mental Hospital in Denton) & 2 weeks since I’ve gotten back from JPS & I’ve been doing better each day.

Waiting patiently is really what matters. I know now that all the times I’ve left with a bad attitude to do something destructive about 5 to 7 times; was the wrong choice. I am thankful that SSDI & my parents; help me every month to pay my rent of $675 & Dad sends $50 through Venmo every Friday.

Holding on to what you have & not getting involved in other people’s business; while at the same time being helpful & kind; is something that has become more important to me. I am wanting to become dedicated to the “Long Term Help” I have & am receiving each day.

Having Respect In Healthy Relationships

I use my prayer journal to keep track of my prayer life and today I have focused on Healthy Relationships; as it is one of my goals for the year to have more meaningful relationships.

Accountability: Admitting mistakes, and accepting responsibility; for behaviors, attitudes, and values.

  • Starts with you; model the behavior that you want to them too meet.
  • When you make commitment’s; keep them and be held responsible for your decisions.
  • An all the time thing; be seen as accountable.
  • Use resources wisely; and have your own success and rewards.
  • Organized planning and Time Management.

Safety: Refusing to intimidate or manipulate, respecting physical space, and expressing yourself non-violently.

  • Safe from undergoing or causing harm, injury, or loss.
  • Being protected from harm or undesirable outcomes.
  • Thinking ahead and working together.
  • Being aware of surroundings and being mindful.
  • Trusting your gut feeling.

Honesty: Communicating openly & truthfully.

  • Refraining from lying, hypocrisy, cheating, and stealing.
  • Moral Character; integrity and truthfulness.
  • Don’t compare yourself to others.
  • Take time to reflect on a daily basis.
  • There is strength in vulnerability.

Support: Support each others choices by being understanding and offering encouragement; listening without being judgemental.

  • Silence can be a good thing but don’t ignore.
  • Don’t wait until they ask for help.
  • Don’t rush painful times; allow time for healing.
  • Don’t make it about yourself.
  • Pay attention to each other.

Cooperation: Asking and not expecting, accepting change and making decisions together that benefit the whole group. Being willing to compromise and having a win win resolution to conflict.

  • Working together towards some end result.
  • Everyone has to be an active member and agree to do what their going to do.
  • Not for selfish benefit.
  • Express understanding of thoughts and feelings.
  • Show empathy without condoning.

Trust: Accepting each others words and giving the benefit of the doubt.

10 Ways To Build Trust in a Relationship –

  • Open conversations; you are both willing to let your guard down & share.
  • Saying what you mean & meaning what you say.
  • Build trust gradually and take the small steps necessary.
  • Don’t expect too much too soon.
  • Make decisions carefully and be organized.

Check out my Pinterest Board on Relationships @ Pinterest

Back To The Roots

“Gutten Morgan!”; That’s German for Good Morning! In July I celebrated my 33rd Birthday with my parents at a German restraunt; and we ate a lot of good food.

That was 7 months ago; I was born in Frankfurt – Germany. A lot has happened since then but I love remembering the good times that me and my family share. My Dad is a disabled Veteran in the Army and served in Afghanistan, Iraq, and Bosnia. My whole family line on my Dad’s side served in the Military and we have a strong background dating back to the Civil War times. Although; he and his twin brother were adopted from Taiwan.

My mother told me yesterday that her side could be described as Native American. I find it interesting about the history of my ancestors now that I am getting older. I use to not give a crap and ran away often to stop my depression and anxiety. I am glad to say I have started this year on a better step and ready to face the challenges that come instead of running away. Currently listening to Ted Talks; and learning things that attain to me right now.

I would be interested in learning more about these cultures and have taken Humanities at Texas Wesleyan as well as Productions; I took these college courses in 2016. This week I want to focus on having a good morning routine and I am going to start calling the counselors that me and my case manager for MHMR found last Friday. Learning is more important than money in my opinion since it can never be erased.

2021 Goals For The New Year

  1. Start JF-Designs
  2. Start Blogging and eventually start blogging for profit
  3. Stay in the group home and not wander off. Also learn how to become more independent and self reliant.
  4. Staying closer to God and the Christian community.
  5. Draw and Write more often.
  6. Start Doing Yoga; started and completed a video today that was a 20 minute yoga starter video on Youtube.
  7. Stay off drugs and the streets.
  8. Take my meds & use my heart rate
  9. Read 5 to 10 Pinterest articles a day to learn more information to use and write about.
  10. Read 18 books; my first book of the year is “The Explosive Child” By Ph. D. Ross W. Greene.
  11. Make Self-Care a priority in life and set a good routine for the day.
  12. Eliminate bad habits one by one.
  13. Keep my room nice and neat and use Hygge.
  14. Put half of my money in savings account and half of my money I can use throughout the month.
  15. Have a greater sense of Family and community.

Working On My About Me Page Today & Social Media:

I need to be careful what I share with the online world. As I am Bipolar and Manic Depressive. I was born in Germany to a great mother and father who have done their best to help me throughout my life. I currently live in a group home. We just had breakfast; of eggs and sausage and toast. I enjoy creativity and learning and experiencing all life has to offer.

I get hard on myself and need to take things more slowly in life and learn to listen to God and follow my heart to make the right decisions. I have faced times of doubt and have had relapses with drugs and hanging with the wrong crowd. I graduated high school in 2015 from DeRidder High School in Lousiana.