Dealing With Depression

As humans we are always searching for something. Though one thing I have dealt with lately is to not become CoDependent. I’m charging my iPhone and sometimes I get irritated that the battery is low. I’m also enjoying my vaporizer and have had about two cups of coffee.

My Blanket from Target $10 and My Halloween Pumpkin 🎃 Pillow From Mission Arlington.

I bought some craft supplies to paint and make pumpkins 🎃 yesterday as Fall is finally here. I’ve been to “The Spirit of Halloween” twice and am thinking about what I want to be for Halloween! I don’t want to spend more than $25 on a costume but I was thinking about being Hello Kitty. Though I haven’t seen one costume that is Hello Kitty; so maybe just a cat. Though I’ll have to wait till it comes closer to time because I’m not getting paid till next Friday.

Things that have been going good though except for battling with my depression. Things causing me depression include:

1. My family; my son has been in a bad mood and I feel we don’t spend enough time together as a family.

2. Dealing with the past; I’m slowly learning to get past it, to stop 🛑 running away, and trusting people that take care of me.

3. My hand 🤚 and how it hurts to write. As it’s my dominant hand ✋ and I don’t know how too write with my left. I haven’t been able to focus on my free courses.

4. I’m owing money to bill collectors for AT&T UVerse which I don’t have and for UTA outstanding loans amounting In $3,500 and FAFSA Loans amounting in $20,000. I don’t think 💭 I’ll be able to go back to school and finish my Senior year.

5. My relationship life; with people and stuff. Especially spiritually, I feel people are overstepping their boundaries.

It’s important that you give all your worrying and needs over to God. I’m learning to be an individual and more of myself as a princess 👑 of God everyday. It’s also a hard political times; as we watch our country struggle. There’s rumors about a fourth stimulus package 📦 but that’s all in the air.

Just Be Patient with yourself and those you love 💕. Be kind in the process but

Heat Waves & Hospital Stays

Its 6PM & I got home from the hospital at 3PM; our weather is getting hot 🥵! My group home MGR received my discharge paper work & gave me my five cigarettes. I have been in the “Mesa Springs” 🏥 since the 25th.

I was surprised that My True Mental Health Personnel was taking me to the 🏥 on Friday. I just got informed that we needed to stop 🛑 services with True Mental.

Each day during inpatient rehab we had about five group sessions lead by the Therapist and Nurses. We learned how to communicate better and there were about 9 people in my group in the “Willows Division”! For the most part I drank a lot of coffee and sodas in my new Tumblr and for the last three days I had no cigarettes to smoke 💨.

I’m happy to say I’m home 🏠; I also called & FaceTime with my Dad & he sent me $50 on my Venmo account. I got into the MHMR vehicle and met my new case manager and before he dropped me off at the house he helped me by taking me to the Shell 🐚 and I spent $12 on a pack of American Spirits 🚬🪛 Military Green & a green lighter.

Having Respect In Healthy Relationships

I use my prayer journal to keep track of my prayer life and today I have focused on Healthy Relationships; as it is one of my goals for the year to have more meaningful relationships.

Accountability: Admitting mistakes, and accepting responsibility; for behaviors, attitudes, and values.

  • Starts with you; model the behavior that you want to them too meet.
  • When you make commitment’s; keep them and be held responsible for your decisions.
  • An all the time thing; be seen as accountable.
  • Use resources wisely; and have your own success and rewards.
  • Organized planning and Time Management.

Safety: Refusing to intimidate or manipulate, respecting physical space, and expressing yourself non-violently.

  • Safe from undergoing or causing harm, injury, or loss.
  • Being protected from harm or undesirable outcomes.
  • Thinking ahead and working together.
  • Being aware of surroundings and being mindful.
  • Trusting your gut feeling.

Honesty: Communicating openly & truthfully.

  • Refraining from lying, hypocrisy, cheating, and stealing.
  • Moral Character; integrity and truthfulness.
  • Don’t compare yourself to others.
  • Take time to reflect on a daily basis.
  • There is strength in vulnerability.

Support: Support each others choices by being understanding and offering encouragement; listening without being judgemental.

  • Silence can be a good thing but don’t ignore.
  • Don’t wait until they ask for help.
  • Don’t rush painful times; allow time for healing.
  • Don’t make it about yourself.
  • Pay attention to each other.

Cooperation: Asking and not expecting, accepting change and making decisions together that benefit the whole group. Being willing to compromise and having a win win resolution to conflict.

  • Working together towards some end result.
  • Everyone has to be an active member and agree to do what their going to do.
  • Not for selfish benefit.
  • Express understanding of thoughts and feelings.
  • Show empathy without condoning.

Trust: Accepting each others words and giving the benefit of the doubt.

10 Ways To Build Trust in a Relationship –

  • Open conversations; you are both willing to let your guard down & share.
  • Saying what you mean & meaning what you say.
  • Build trust gradually and take the small steps necessary.
  • Don’t expect too much too soon.
  • Make decisions carefully and be organized.

Check out my Pinterest Board on Relationships @ Pinterest