Dealing With Depression

As humans we are always searching for something. Though one thing I have dealt with lately is to not become CoDependent. I’m charging my iPhone and sometimes I get irritated that the battery is low. I’m also enjoying my vaporizer and have had about two cups of coffee.

My Blanket from Target $10 and My Halloween Pumpkin 🎃 Pillow From Mission Arlington.

I bought some craft supplies to paint and make pumpkins 🎃 yesterday as Fall is finally here. I’ve been to “The Spirit of Halloween” twice and am thinking about what I want to be for Halloween! I don’t want to spend more than $25 on a costume but I was thinking about being Hello Kitty. Though I haven’t seen one costume that is Hello Kitty; so maybe just a cat. Though I’ll have to wait till it comes closer to time because I’m not getting paid till next Friday.

Things that have been going good though except for battling with my depression. Things causing me depression include:

1. My family; my son has been in a bad mood and I feel we don’t spend enough time together as a family.

2. Dealing with the past; I’m slowly learning to get past it, to stop 🛑 running away, and trusting people that take care of me.

3. My hand 🤚 and how it hurts to write. As it’s my dominant hand ✋ and I don’t know how too write with my left. I haven’t been able to focus on my free courses.

4. I’m owing money to bill collectors for AT&T UVerse which I don’t have and for UTA outstanding loans amounting In $3,500 and FAFSA Loans amounting in $20,000. I don’t think 💭 I’ll be able to go back to school and finish my Senior year.

5. My relationship life; with people and stuff. Especially spiritually, I feel people are overstepping their boundaries.

It’s important that you give all your worrying and needs over to God. I’m learning to be an individual and more of myself as a princess 👑 of God everyday. It’s also a hard political times; as we watch our country struggle. There’s rumors about a fourth stimulus package 📦 but that’s all in the air.

Just Be Patient with yourself and those you love 💕. Be kind in the process but

Fall’s Here & Starting To Learn Emotional Stability

As the weather start’s to change, I started my job working at Heritage Daycare Center. We started about 1PM; sorting invoices, receipts, and mail that my manager had. I woke up at 4AM; my roommate made coffee, and we’ve been watching tv. I’m studying, and drinking coffee and we’ve had a few cigarettes. I’m currently taking a course on Coursera.org about Managing Emotions in Times of Uncertainty and Stress. We’re also watching Joyce Myer’s talking about relationships.

Emotional Stability to me means; being held accountable, working through trials and differences, and changing into a better person. I see my Psychiatrist today through a meeting with my case manager this week and a video conference. My roommate noticed I have been feeling insecure and depressed recently and I haven’t been my cheerful self. I talked to My Dad yesterday and lately we’ve been talking about health.

As humans we experience an array of different emotions. For example starting my job helped me feel more relaxed and needed and happy. Though when I think of my social life I get lonely, hard on myself, and regretted with guilt. Honoring these emotions can be empowering and can lead to positive action.

Labor Day Weekend

Happy Labor Day! Today we we’re allowed to smoke whenever we wanted too. We had Sweet Rolls for breakfast and pizza for lunch. We celebrate Labor Day because of the work we have endured as individuals. I have worked at Good Will, Target, and Ross in the past. These we’re pretty good working experiences.

Happy 4th Of July

It’s Almost 9AM 🇺🇸 and I’m planning on organizing my room. I have a huge stack of papers to go through & I plan on getting my stuff together for the move to the new house.

Drinking coffee ☕️ and thinking about what I can do to help myself improve in the next couple of months. My Birthday is coming up and I’ll be 34. On Friday; I went to the dentist 🦷 and they did another fitting for my new dentures.

I want to come across as a strong independent woman who doesn’t need that much help from anyone to get what I want in life. One positive way I can become more Independent is too do a good self-assessment of where I am at the current moment.

At the current moment; I am feeling liberated as today is Fourth of July. I’m sitting with my roommate listening to Christian music 🎶 and thinking of what I missed at church this morning. I’m reading through articles on Pinterest & looking forward to lunch. I know I need to do more research and writing about self-improvement to stop negative behavior.