I woke up at 8AM this morning; and my case manager picked me up at 10AM to go to the PCP. I have had a good but hard day; for one my WordPress is working on my laptop and I just took a shower and washed my long black hair. My care giver has been wanting me to take a shower everyday and start taking better care of myself since we have moved into this house. The PCP said my hand has gotten better and she was shocked at the improvement. I wrote about in a previous post that I had gotten frost bite in February when I walked out of the Group Home and it started snowing. I finally returned on March 12th and I’ve been sober for three months now. I go back to see my PCP on the 17th; and it’s important that I keep all my appointments.
I Was Diagnosed At 11: As Bipolar after going into Nicoma at my Grandmother’s kitchen table and I feel asleep for two weeks in the hospital. As I got older I’ve been diagnosed as Bipolar Skitzophrenic, Border Line Personality Disorder, and Manic Depressive. I am on a good bit of psych-meds and am being seen by the MHMR team here in Fort Worth. I just took my medicine given to me by my care giver.
Family Values: I need to get right with myself; before I can get right with my family.
I’m not planning on calling my family everyday but earlier I couldn’t help it; and sent Dad a Text. Worrying about how they are doing; does no good. Right now it’s best just to give them space like they have asked for. My parents are adopting the little boy I gave birth to who just turned 7 on December 28th; and we don’t have a good relationship last time I called he said he hated me. Though in the past this has left me wanting to run away; which I have five times. God; I put this into your hands and go to God in guidance to separate me from this vicious cycle. Dad had asked me earlier this week to reach to my ex who left when I was 7 months pregnant and just added me on my old Facebook for his address and phone number to get him to sign the adoption papers. Though; he never sent them and Dad said I ran him off.
I still love my family; although I am the black sheep in the family after doing several things wrong; and the last time I have seen them is on Mother’s Day a couple of weeks ago. “I may not have been the best daughter, mother, girlfriend, or friend; but I was always myself and tried to do what I could. I release all of these broken bridges to God and let it rest until it improves!”
How I Can Start Taking Better Care Of Myself
- Focus on myself and my relationship with God; before focusing on myself around others. To be in good relationships you have to be taking the best care of yourself.
- I need to set a dental appointment and try to get dentures.
- I need to set an OBGYN appointment.
- I need to take a shower everyday; and wash my face in the mornings,
- I need to take my heart rate everyday,
I know that’s not the right answer now and staying in The Group Home is in my best interest.
We eat really